On a scale of 1 to "over trusting"...I am "pretty damn naive".

weRdoomed's Archive
women
  • Story Photo

    There is something depressing about returning to the ballet world, knowing I will not and cannot be competitive in it any longer.  I tried to convince myself that the love of the art was enough reason to continue it, but it was damaging to my inner child so (for now) I am only conducting informal, in house classes for myself when I have the time (never).

    Also, I have been struggling with some old lower back issues compounded by the repetitive lifting of a 20lbs baby.  So, I needed to find a fun and engaging activity that would encourage my fitness level and keep me flexible.  Luckily, living in a more city-like setting has it's perks. 

    I have been interested in pole dancing for a while.  I saw a Youtube video of a girl called the "Vertical Ballerina" and I loved her grace and beauty and how she made pole dancing seem sleek and demure.

    Google "pole dancing fitness in Fort Worth, TX" and there are a lot of hits!  So, I had my first class recently and it was great - I love it!  I am pretty aggressive with myself so I, of course, overdid and ended up with some ugly bruises on my wrists and upper arms, but it definitely fulfills all my requirements for fun and fitness.

    Ladies - if you're looking for a fun way to stay in shape and feel good about yourself as a woman, you may want to give it a try -- all fitness levels are welcome in these classes.  Just be sure you choose a studio that has an experienced instructor who knows what she is doing.  Eventually, you can do inverts (upside down tricks!) and those are dangerous enough without an instructor who doesn't know what she is doing! 

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    It occurred to me recently while watching the movie 50/50 that there is a disturbing (in my opinion) trend in the way friendships are portrayed in the media.  Specifically, the difference between friendships between men vs. friendships between women and not in the way you would assume.

    Despite the fact that women are cited as being "emotional" and sensitive - it is male friendships which are portrayed with depth and intrigue in movies.  The relationships between women are portrayed as shallow and/or deceptive.

    Can you think of a female equivalent for movies like The Shawshank Redemption?  Is there any example of a female friendship that doesn't use being scorned by a lover as an emotional crutch?

    This is particularly upsetting in an age when we have yet to succeed in having a say in our reproductive health (all-male panel speaking before Congress about birth control, anyone?).  Friendships are crucial for emotional support and richness in life.  Sincere friendships give a kind of freedom to the one in the relationship and the fact that women have so few examples or role models of this very important relationship is disturbing.

    There are movies that boast a female-female lead.  But the connection is often shallow and almost exclusively relies on the betrayl of a lover or romantic heartbreak to set the stage.  The few examples of female-female led  movies that were more substantial than the aforementioned theme were mostly flops at the box office.

    Of course, I may be looking at this entire situation through gray-colored glasses as a bitter, female-friendless dame myself.  What do you think?

  • Story Photo

    It isn't a secret that pregnancy takes a toll on the mother's body.  It can even take a vicarious toll on the father's body.  Throughout my pregnancy, I took many measures to ensure the health of my baby and myself.  Admittedly, part of my efforts were to salvage as much as my body as possible.

    My upbringing and active participation in the competitive world of ballet made me extremely self-conscious and I knew that the effects of pregnancy could leave me unfairly focused on my changed body instead of my new baby.  So, I was extremely pleased that my efforts were worthwhile and I was left with just a little needed tightening after the birth.

    Obviously, a new baby is very distracting in the most positive way.  I was never so UNfocused on myself and my image.  I was more carefree (in this specific way) than I had ever been.  I was amazed at what my body had accomplished -- more proud of it than any time in my ballet career.  And I was equally impressed by every other mother's body in the world.  We are amazing machines, mamas!  Harsh criticism of our bodies is unwarranted and should go away immediately.

    Now, my son is nearing 9 months of age and a sort-of routine has come into play.  I am getting to know him and he is getting to know me.  We are both happy with who we have been introduced to.  So, some of my attention can turn back towards me and as I surveyed the damage, I only have one complaint ... what happened to my breasts?!

    I nursed my son for only four months (long story...).  I would have liked to have done it longer.  During that time is when I think my breasts took the most affront.  Without getting too graphic - the constant "filling up" and "emptying" was probably the reason that now, I get the willies when I feel them...

    It's not the most drastic thing in the world.  It's pretty subtle actually...they used to feel like they were full of...well, something.  What, I'm not sure.  Now, it's like 10% of that something has been taken away so they feel soft and somehow out of place on my body.

    And I cannot accurately determine if I am remembering how firm they were when I was nursing (as, even when they were 'empty', they still had something to offer) or if I really was firmer before nursing.

    Was this how they always felt?

    *shrug* It's not that it really bothers me.  It's just...different.  Oh, and different apparently makes me do weird stuff like stand on my head before bed (I thought I would have gravity work with me...though sagging isn't really the problem - it's difficult for breasts as small as mine to sag).

    Anyway -- there it is -- one of the many wonders of motherhood!

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    Often touted as the epitome of compassion and "motherly love", I observe women to be more petty and more vicious in their social starvation of "enemies" than a man could ever dream to be.  Lacking physical force, they can be disturbingly cunning in their vitriolic and systematic verbal assassinations of those whom they do not approve.

    Interestingly, this largely ignored feature of the fairer sex is most poisonous to other women.  Perhaps it is in our DNA to attempt to make other women who would otherwise be competition for the fittest male look like a pathetic choice for him.  Just look at how women react when they find out another woman is having an affair, for example.

    Here is a quote from a female Viner regarding a 96-year old woman whose 99-year old husband is divorcing her after he found out she had an affair in the 1940's:

    Fact of the matter is she's a liar and a cheat. One step up from a common whore, in my book.

    And here is a comment from a man regarding the Tiger Woods sex scandal:

    Elin should forgive and forget to make the marriage work. Forgiving is the first step. One transgression does not wreck a marriage. We are all imperfect.

    Here is a what a woman thought about the situation:

    I thnik that everyone should leave me Tiger Woods alone. It is nobody's business and I guess that is no other news that is why everyone is staying on this story. He is handsome and his wife is beautiful and they need to try and make this work in spite of all this crap.

    Women are hard-wired to be the emotional and/or physical slaves of men.  It's not easy to overcome your basic instincts.  Women want to absolve, excuse, and show compassion for the errors of men.  But they are wholly incapable of extending that to their fellow womankind.  Perhaps that is hard-wired too.

    There is a reason women are so subjugated and I think that reason is because, in many cases, they want to be.  They are designed for it.  They strip themselves of female friends and support so when they are in vulnerable situations, they often have no one to turn to whom they can really trust.

    Women are incapable of being true friends to one another.  They are too concerned with eachother's business...and too judgemental when one of them makes a mistake. 

    Men, on the other hand, like to stay out of their friend's business.  And they tend to live up to the word: LOYALTY.  Women invented the concept of "backstabbing" and they just can't keep their pretty lips shut when a girl is in the wrong. 

    A woman president?  Someday...but she'd be a fool to take a female vice president!

  • Nantucket Nights is a fiction novel written by Elin Hilderbrand which explores the friendship of three unique women.  Artfully written with excellent dipictions that create clear images without being too wordy - Hilderbrand sets a beautiful stage for the power of secrets and the realization that we never really know anyone.

    She skillfully keeps the ending shrouded in mystery and successfully engages the reader with the main character, Kayla, so you find yourself deeply affected as she is dragged through a series of emotionally-charged situations.

    Good to the last drop though many readers will be left reeling, Hilderbrand is an excellent storyteller who has created a novel fit for the pickiest of Book Club readers.  Many intereting character traits, flaws, situations, and details to sink your teeth into and discuss, debate, and commiserate on.

    The title doesn't do the book justice.  Don't pass this gem by.

  • Black, reflective, small, or huge celebrity-style - - everyone looks better in sunglasses. The amount of attractiveness in which your appearance increases varies from person to person, but everyone looks more attractive in sunglasses.

    I always reserve judgement for whether someone is pretty or handsome until they remove their shades. I would say attractiveness drops by 10-70% once the shades are removed so you don't want to jump to any conclusions too soon.

    Also, when I was single, I refrained from hitting on anyone until I saw them with their sunglasses off. I am, therefore, equally suspricious of anyone who enters the indoors with their shades on and doesn't remove them. What are they trying to hide?

    It's odd too because eyes are the "windows to the soul" and since sunglasses make you more attractive that must mean that the soul has little to do with initial attractiveness. Maybe it's the vulnerability of the eyes that makes us uncomfortable?

    How do you rate in a good pair of shades? How much better do YOU look behind your specs?

  • In a relatively recent political evolution, the social "values" a person has have been attached to a political spectrum. This presents a great deal of frustration for people who, in the past, may have been politically conservative, but socially liberal...or vice versa.

    Today, the political spectrum you identify with comes with a chunk of social values that you are assumed to have.

    Liberal women, for example, are largely considered career-oriented, pro-education (often highly educated themselves), they don't wear make-up or heels, may not shave, and they eat organic. If you stray from this mold, your political views will be subject to scrutiny.

    Furthermore, this false mold (which is applied to all people, conservative and liberal, men and women - though this article is focusing on liberal women) influences how liberal men behave towards liberal women.

    In a liberal/liberal relationship, a man doesn't open doors, remember anniversary dates, or think pregnancy is a "miracle". He shows the porn he looks at to his wife, doesn't need to ask if it's okay to hang out with his friends, and doesn't get upset when laundry is just shoved into the drawers instead of folded.

    Now, don't get me wrong, there are good points to be "treated" like a liberal woman. But there are annoying aspects too. I mean, don't I enjoy a candlelight dinner as much as the next girl? And why should I be ashamed to get my hair done once in a while or worse, my nails?

    When did conservative women corner the market on the "gentleman"? Has it always been this way and I'm only just noticing or are we (de)evolving to the point where we have to select our political party based on our desired relationship dynamic?

  • "One or two women on a desk of 20 men is not enough, because they will just learn to blend in." That is in the unlikely event they manage to stay on the team: "Women in hedge funds are steered into research and sales – you have to fight to stay in the trading arena."

  • The other evening, I was watching a TV documentary about Gender and the Brain -- determining the differences in the brain simply based on gender.

    In one experiment - they put a baby in a virtually empty room and would then have an individual go in and change the baby's diaper. They gave no other instructions aside from "enter room, change baby's diaper, then we will come back in".

    As each individual took their turn, the researchers observed, that (in general) men and women change diapers in a very similar fashion. The behavior after the diaper is change is where there is a difference.

    Time after time, when I woman changed the baby's diaper, she would then pick the baby up and bounce or hold them until the researcher came back into the room.

    The men, however, would just sort of look around the room awkwardly glancing from the door to the baby until the researcher returned.

    But on the 62nd diaper change for the gentleman, a middle-aged man in jeans and a t-shirt, changed the baby's diaper just like everyone before had and then he picked the baby up, even cuddling the baby a bit and talking softly to her. The difference? This was the first man who came in who had children of his own.

    So in the debate over Nature Vs. Nurture...when it comes to cuddling babies...both play a role!

  • In 2010, 37 percent of the technology leaders were women. This percentage is greater than the overall percentage of women in technology positions — about 25 percent — in 2008, according to Women in IT.

    Nearly 50 percent of the current CIOs in higher education plan to retire within the next decade, which creates a great opportunity for individuals in the technology leader group to move into these positions.

  • High Heels have been around a long time. Almost as long as women have been oppressed. *awkward silence*

    Without getting into the long, boring history of gender roles and shoe wear - let me give you the "high"lights.

    First, shoes were historically used a symbol of status (e.g. rich people have shoes, poor people don't). The high heel is credited to Queen Catherine (wife of Henry II of France). She apparantly had the shoe fashioned specifically for her to meet her desire to appear taller though there is evidence that Italians were wearing "raised shoes" (more like platform shoes today), this was the first instance described in which a shoe was given height in only the heel.

    Of course, the forever fashion-conscious French caught on to the trend right away (back in the day when royalty dictacted the fads). In those days, men and women wore heels as a symbol of wealth. During the French Revolution, heels fell out of fashion almost entirely (due to their association with Aristocracy). But, in the late 1800's they made a comeback ... for some reason, almost exclusively with women.

    So, you see, it can be argued that the high heel really had little or nothing to do with the sexism and female oppresion it is commonly associated with today.

    Fast forward and you have the variety of high heels known today: kitten, prism, spool, and the ever-sexy, stiletto.

    Recently, I read of the (obvious?) physical complications caused by high heel wearing: tighter calf muscles and shorter achilles tendons. These are pretty unpleasant conditions that, as a ballet dancer, I can tell you will cause unnecessary pain. The solution is pretty simple: 1) stretch your calf muscles before and after wearing high heels and 2) give your feet a break every once in a while and wear flats.

    For me, I wear heels nearly everyday to the office in the mornings. I love the way they make my legs look in a skirt and I am on the short side so they make me feel (and look) taller. I never wear anything higher than a 3-inch heel - why? Because I have found that every woman who walks in something higher looks like a T-Rex when she is walking...not pretty. I save the 4-inch heels for the bedroom (when I don't plan on doing a lot of walking *wink wink*).

    So, ladies, wear your heels proudly, they aren't a sign of submission (if anything, they make a great, portable weapon for self-defense......and I've found I'm better able to get a man to submit to me while wearing them than the other way around).

    Just don't forget to keep the dinosaur walking to a minimum. And stretch those calves!

  • I am a girl -er- a woman. I am straight. I am a straight woman.

    But I have a girl crush.

    She is a teacher at the school where I teach ballet. She teaches hip hop. At first, I was just impressed by her ability to bump n' grind whilst all I can do is twirl n' curtsie. "How bad ass she is!" I thought when I saw her warming up for her class. She laughed at me when I said I thought she was bad ass and we got to talking.

    Turns out we're the same age and we both grew up on the East Coast. Somewhere in the midst of polite conversation, I noticed she has really nice hair. No biggie, I might wanna ask her what kinda shampoo she uses, I've done that before.

    Next week, I watched the end of her class and we swapped advice on how to manage behavior in the pre-teen age group. Those little tarts can be a handful. She introduced me to her boyfriend who had come to pick her up. She told me to come early for my class the following week and she'd teach me some hip hop moves. I told my husband about her and I realized I described her as "pretty".

    Then I got to thinking, yeah, she is pretty. She's a Kristen Stewart meets Angelina Jolie meets Tara Alba. I'm a a little envious of her prettiness...

    Next week, she shows me some dance moves and tells me I'm a "natural". She laughs a lot and she's super nice. I tell her I'm jealous of her flat abs, she tells me she's jealous of my flexibility. We agree to coach eachother - she'll show me 8 counts of hip hop and then I'll show her 8 counts of ballet. We're friends!!

    Yesterday, boyfriend comes and picks her up again and they kiss in front of me and I think 2 things: 1) Awww! That is so cute! and 2) She has kissable lips.

    WTF!? I turn red. Stewart/Jolie/Alba look alike asks me if something is wrong. Ummmm....no, I stammer. I just think I might be gay!!

    *sigh* of relief when I tell my husband. "You just have a girl crush is all" he says casually.

    What's a girl crush?! What if it gets worse?! Maybe I should avoid her....

  • The oldest profession in the world. Trading sex for money.

    Hookers, Whores, Call Girls, Prostitutes. For years, the idea of legalizing prostitution has been tossed around. Those who support the idea say that legalizing and regulating sex trade could help the federal and/or state budgets in terms of taxation and that it would improve the health of the citizens by limiting sexually transmitted diseases.

    But prostitution is more a moral issue that a legal one. If prostitution was made legal, would it be a profession you'd hope for you child? Do we honestly believe that any prostitute can feel satisfied and content with her lifestyle? Survey any prostitute on the street today and you'll find it's all broken pasts, abuse, drugs, and insecurity. Even the most well-adjusted girls seem to battle inner demons.

    It's akin to the porn industry. Porn is legal, but think to the last porn movie you watched - especially the amateur pornography that is so popular today. Do you imagine those girls are happy? Do you honestly think that, all other circumstances ideal, that that is the life they truly want for themselves?

    If prostitution was made legal - do you believe that a woman could be sincerely happy and satisfied with life as a prostitute? If not, do we - as a country - have an obligation to prevent women from getting into the industry - have an obligation to ensure it stays illegal?

    If you believe a woman can have a happy, fulfilling, satisfied life as a prostitute, then why isn't it legal?

  • I don't care about unborn babies.

    It's hard to admit, let alone write. But there it is, I am pro-choice. And I don't care about unborn babies.

    Before a baby is born, the only person I care about is the woman. Whenever a woman becomes pregnant, my hope and commitment is only to her having access to all of the information she needs. If she decides to carry the baby to full term, that commitment becomes ensuring she knows how to care for herself so that the baby has the best chance of being full-term and healthy.

    Ideally, she will have access to vitamins, healthy food, educational programs, an OBGYN that she trusts, and supportive family and/or friends. If not, I support programs being in place to fill those gaps whether they be public or private.

    As a woman, I truly believe that when a woman becomes pregnant, her first instinct is to want to keep it. I believe, unless something is horribly wrong with her, she feels an instinct to want to care for it. I support her in doing everything possible to make that happen. I support others in their attempt to reach out to women who are in a percaious state and filling the gaps that will help them fulfill this natural instinct to mother so long as they do so without manipulation and shaming or fear tactics.

    If those gaps are not filled and a woman determines that she cannot provide for a child and chooses to abort it - I support her having access to facilities to do so safely. I believe she should be able to do so without shame or violence directed at her. I believe she should have access to counseling if she wants or needs it both before and afterwards.

    This is the root of the disconnect between pro-choice and pro-life supporters. Pro-lifers put their emphasis on the unborn. Pro-choicers put their emphasis on the carrier of the unborn.

    Photos of fetuses in various stages of development do not move me except in fascination of pure biology. I do not fear the wrath of God. Whenever I am confronted by the radical pro-life movement, I can only think of the women who have made this difficult choice and the extreme disservice it does them to be ridiculed by those who believe they are better than her.

    I do not care about unborn babies. I care about the women who carry them; who, regardless of their choice (to abort or give birth), will have to live with it forever - prepared or not.

    Is there any common ground that can be found in this extremely sensitive matter?

  • "What a lame ass movie this is...22 freakin' dollars for this @!$%#? She said it was about vampires - aren't vampires supposed to be scary?...not some dopey high school kid with mood swings?...I shoulda...wait...is that her hand?......damn it is her hand!"
    _______________________________

    Kids are finally in bed. What a long, miserable day. Sheets are clean though, that's nice. Man, I'm wide awake!! Stupid, stupid, stupid...
    "How about a massage, honey?"
    A massage? What's that? ...Oh yeah...man, that feels good...alright, alright, I'll take off my shirt....
    Oooo...I love it when he kisses me there...and there. Oh! I don't know...I'm so tired...
    "Kiss my neck." Yeah, that feels good. Mmmm...glad I remembered to brush my teeth....

    _______________________________

    Foreplay. Sometimes it's subtle, a quick kiss, a brush of his fingers against your cheek. Sometimes, it's obvious, a grab your face - make you weak in the knees kiss; a firm grasp of your waist and dirty talk that only you can hear. Sometimes, it's has nothing to do with sex - he surprised you by washing the dishes, the kid's are at grandma's, or she surprises you at the office for lunch, ahem, lunch I said!

    Once you get the green light, a lot of people jump right to the finish line. But what happened to getting it in gear? Fastening your safety belt? Settting the radio? There is a lot more to forplay than just getting the other person to agree to take it off.

    Everyone has a favorite spot to tease. Do you know your partner's favorite spot(s)? Is it a kiss, lick, pinch, or touch that does it? How much attention does their body need before you can know you'l reach your destination?

    If foreplay is a race, I intend on coming in last place.....

  • Is it a good idea for women to be stopping their periods by continually taking birth control pills?

  • Story Photo

    It is difficult for me to put the American view of men in ballet into perspective. I grew in the ballet world and the ballet school I attended had many boys. In addition, my brother also attended classes.

    To ballerinas, men in the field are elegant, strong, trustworthy, and sturdy. In the typical modern ballet, a ballerina will trust her partner to lift, turn, support, and guide her body weight through complex movements. A failure of a male dancer can and has resulted in minor and serious injuries - including bruises, bumps, and even broken bones.

    If a male dancer is not strong - he can hurt himself. If he is not strong - he can hurt his partner. If he is not strong - he can humiliate himself and his partner. Most modern ballets require the male dancer to lift a 110-130 pound woman over his head with one hand multiple times in a short time frame --- and make it look easy!

    George Balanchine, founder of the NYC Ballet, said many times that a male dancer's only role is to make the ballerina even more beautiful.

    Young male and female dancers have a different, more mature interaction with one another. For one thing, touching eachother, often in a rather intimate fashion is required. Trust is a primary component to the dance partnership; the ballerina trusts that her partner will be able to lift her, hold her, and not drop her during difficult lifts. Ballet also has elements of chivalry and, perhaps, archaic traditions (men always stand in the back of the classroom if there are women present, men bow once after a performance while the ballerina bows twice, etc.)

    The men I have met in the ballet world have consistently been kinder, more respectful, more mature...and hotter! than those compared to men I've met in other areas of life (the office, the bar, the grocery store, the government!).

    ...And they haven't been anymore gay than them either!

  • The cultural stereotypes that discourage young men from taking part in ballet do not exist in Russia, and so Valery has a hard time understanding them.

    Ballerinas are generally light women, but they're not so light that they can be lifted into the air and balanced without some power. And unlike an athlete who can grunt and grimace when he performs a huge leap or runs until he's used all his energy, dancers must perform their feats and stay in character, all the while disguising their heavy breathing. Russian culture views this as an entirely masculine role.

  • Story Photo

    They come in all shapes and sizes, pink ribbons have made it okay to look, they are enlarged, reduced, under-wired, taped, pushed up, strapped down, and some other unmentionable things.

    They give us confidence, destroy our confidence, hell, they can actually kill us! We see them everywhere. We're asked to flaunt them. We're criticized if we flaunt them. Every other person has them. Every other person wants to touch them.

    They are known by many names, but only one I feel comfortable typing on the Vine...

    Boobs! And while they are as varied as the women who own them, it often comes down to two categories: big and small.

    In the "big" corner we have back aches, ugly bras, and the taunts of high school boys.

    In the "small" corner we have baggy tops, the bruised ego, and...the taunts of high school boys.

    So, while we're all having them poked and prodded. Who has it worse? The girls with boobs that are too big or the girls with boobs that are too small?

    And, while we're at it, what is the "right size".

    Actually, what's the big deal with boobs anyway?

  • Aikido has no offensive moves.

    You use the attackers energy against them. If they pull on you, you don't pull back, you push forward, into them -- pushing them off their balance.

    If they push you, you pull them with you, again getting them off their balance.

    In aikido, the phrase we like to use is "The harder they come, the harder they fall."

  • I'm a Feminist, I’m progressive, liberal, and independent. So, I thought about it…should women be allowed to ask out men? Well, let me start over, that came out wrong. Of course women are allowed to ask men out, but should they?

    I mulled it over with the obvious answers going through my mind before I figured it out – No! Women should not ask men out…here is why:

    Men are, arguably, more focused on looks than a woman. Ultimately, he will not marry a woman he is not attracted to and I hear far more stories about women growing attracted to a man than I hear of men growing attracted to a woman.

    For a man, he is attracted to a woman, learns more about her and she becomes more or less attractive as a result of what he learns.

    Women are normally “won over” by a man: that can include his looks, but is also strongly tied to the amount of effort he puts into her pursuit, his personality, thoughtfulness, sense of humor, etc. Many women end up married to a man they didn’t think was all that attractive at just face value, but he turned into a delicious bowl of matrimony after the whole package was presented.

    Asking a person out falls into the category of “winning over” a person – that is the man’s job. Being initially attracted enough to see if this could go anywhere – also the man’s job. Therefore, it is really putting the cart before the horse for a woman to ask a man out. If he was attracted to you, he would have already asked you out!

    If he hasn’t asked you out, there isn’t enough of an initial pull for him, and that would be okay if he was a woman because you could potentially win him over. But he is a man so if he doesn’t just turn you down right there, there is a good chance he will eventually. Rejection hurts initially, but it hurts even more when you've been married with two kids and a goldfish to find out your hubby realizes he was never really all that attracted to you to begin with and he realizes he really is, however, initially attracted to that secretary in his office.

    So ladies, just as sure as the sun rises, it’s a man’s job to ask a woman out. Of course, don’t let me stop you…

    Just consider yourself warned.

  • Men cheat because...well...why the hell not?

  • Had a wife, but couldn't keep her....
    John Edwards. Tiger Woods. Bill Clinton. Hugh Grant. Jude Law. Kobe Bryant. John F. Kennedy. Rudy Giuliani. Mark Sanford. John Ensign. Robert Livingston. David Vitter.

    Husband cheats, wife leaves. Husband cheats, wife stays. The reality is that a lot of men are cheating. I would like to be fair and say so do women (and they do), but I cannot get over the idea that men and women cheat for different reasons. And I will be controverisal and say men, on the whole, cheat for shallow reasons. The reason I say this is that, if a man is honestly unhappy in a relationship, he can leave.

    I know what you're thinking - a woman can leave just as easily! Not so. Women in western society are valued for their youth. It is generally accepted (though perhaps not discussed openly) that women age much more poorly than men. If a woman is married for any length of time and if she has children - her attractiveness (in the eyes of society) is greatly diminished. If she is to become unhappy in her marriage, leaving is a huge burden. Statistically:
    She will have the majority of custody over her children
    She will be older (duh)
    She will most likely keep the house (to accomodate the children)

    Three small factors that reek havoc on any chance at "starting fresh". A man, on the other hand, gains mainly freedom and a few gray hairs. Often times he will often gain a much younger wife. Lucky him.

    Women stay in bad marriages because it is very hard to leave them. We are told from the beginning that each passing year reduces our desirability. And that baby weight sure isn't helping matters much.

    Men cheat because...well...why the hell not?

    And what is the meaning of that childhood rhyme?

    Peter, Peter, Pumpkineater.
    Had a wife and couldn't keep her.
    He put her in a pumpkin shell.
    And there he kept her
    very well.

  • Before Feminism:
    Wake up at 6:00 a.m., make eggs and bacon in my bathrobe, get the children dressed and off to school, make my husband's lunch and kiss him goodbye, do a load of laundry, wash the dishes, make the beds, take the chicken out to defrost, eat light lunch, shower and dress, work on my quilt, take a trip to the market for groceries, put groceries away, greet children, help with homework, make dinner, freshen up my make up, greet husband, eat dinner with family, put children to bed, pack lunches for next day, spend time with husband, go to bed.

    After Feminism:
    Wake up at 5:00 a.m., jog, walk the dog, shower and dress, toast and pass out pop-tarts, get children dressed and off to school, leave before husband is out of the shower, work at office for seven hours, pick up pizza, pick up children, drive children to soccer practice, wash clothes while children are gone, pick children up, eat cold pizza, load dish washer, pack lunches for next day, fold laundry, put kids to bed, pay bills, put out the trash, walk the dog, call pest control about ants, check stock portfolio, get into bed, hear husband come home at midnight, pretend not to know he's having an affair.

About this Author
Vineacity
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Member Since: 10/2009
Last Seen: 5/16/2012
I forgive everyone. All humans eventually disappoint you, hurt you, or leave you. We don't do it on purpose. I'm sad.

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